Time, Vacuums, and the Circus
March 18, 2017
So what now? So little time, so much to do...
After experiencing that "ah" moment with the high school band last week, it has been difficult to maintain the momentum.
I find myself often beginning projects with a lot of excitement and passion, then days later the initial excitement turns to...despair.
This is quite analogous to my life. It is a blessing and a curse. A blessing because I know this about myself so I am driven to get as much done as quickly as possible. A curse because I know that I don't have the large chunks of time I need to devote to complete each project.
You see, I am Mom to two crazy, smart, and creative kids, I am a wife to a wonderful and supportive husband, a private bassoon instructor to three great kids, and I am a devoted and dedicated band director at a small school with a one director staff.
Somewhere in there I'm supposed to find time to compose. The time does exist, I know it does. The only problem is, I work best under close deadlines and I am oddly cool under pressure. This means I compose best when I can devote 12 continuous hours to one project. At the end of those 12 hours, it will be done...whatever it is, it will be done.
You see the predicament.
So what do vacuums have to do with this? According to the Oxford Dictionary, one definition of vacuum is "A gap left by the loss, death, or departure of someone or something significant."
There are so many aspects to the creative life that create vacuums everywhere. When your mind, body, and soul want nothing more to do than to create art, anything that is not a productive element in that process is a vacuum. The irony in all of this is that the very thing that creates the inspiration for composing: the pain, the joy, the sadness, and the love, is the very thing that creates these vacuums. Life.
Now it's on to the circus with my family. I LOVE CIRCUSES! Maybe that's why God saw fit to make me a band director.
Until next time...